Today Gus wants to talk politics. Gus, as you may not know, is an inner voice so when he said that I just sighed because I thought he meant politics and that's just not my forte. He was a little taken aback and quickly explained that it's spelled p o l y t i c k s (2 words). I still figured he was just one of the slower inner voices I have but it turns out that it was just me that was the slow one this time.
Gus quickly explained that poly ticks are those that I refer to as the house pests. This would be my sister, her kids and all the other miscellaneous people that come around because of them. It then all clicked for me and I laughed and laughed, I have to admit I may have even peed a little. They don't suck my blood like ticks but they definitely suck.... maybe just my sanity but that was fleeting to begin with so I can't totally blame them alone for that.
Gus on the other hand has more issues with them because he's from a day where people actually appreciated when others helped them out in their time of need. I explained to Gus that those times, much like my sanity, are fleeting. I didn't get far in that explanation because you see Gus, unlike most of the inner voices, is actually my age. He tells me I have the idea that appreciation is fleeting because I allow people to take advantage of me. Well to that I say.... um, ok... he's right. Only certain people though and it's more cause... who the hell knows why really. There is some sense of obligation, I'm the oldest child, I've always been the responsible one... Gus wasn't around back in the day! He didn't like that last answer:-) Honestly he was, he's my age for Pete's sake so of course he was. Wait, I shouldn't bring Pete into this quite yet... moving on....
So, poly ticks... that's what they are. Each and every one of them. They also don't hear very well or they just like to ignore me. I assume it's the latter cause they definitely hear when they want to. I have been threatening to kick them all out now for who knows how long. Gus tells me it's been way before I even let them move in and he's probably right. So sad it all is really. The sister, she is 5 years younger than me and has made all the wrong choices in life. Now I know as a kid you sometimes make bad choices so that you can have fun, or what you think may be some fun, but why is it some just never get to a point where they realize that it's time to grow up?
Gus has tried to explain it to me but I still don't get it. Maybe I refuse to get it cause of that fleeting sanity I spoke of earlier. As I watched a show tonight I heard a great line that helps me explain things a little but raises other questions. I've always wondered why my sister is the way she is, when I was younger I used to say that her real dad's name is Tyrone. I have a brother also and we used to laugh and laugh because when she gets mad her nostrils flare out like James Evan's... you know, the dad from Good Times. Gus, he thinks she looks Mexican, as do a lot of people for some odd reason. I say she is not the product of either of my parents; she was "born from the cunt of the underbelly of the underworld!" The question is why the hell she was then put in with our family? My dad's side of the family leaves something to be desired but there isn't a special place in Hell waiting for them or anything (well not any more special than most of those doing hard time). I don't know my mom's cause they are still in Germany but it's not like any of them can be linked directly to Hitler or anything. You know, if they did then hell yeah we deserve some retribution for that but nope... no link so what is it?
Ok, Gus is telling me I'm flying off on a tangent cause his concern is me getting her out of my house. You see there is an opportunity coming up where she will be gone for 90 days (the past does always catch up with her but she has yet to learn and grow from that). 2 of her kids are already not living under my roof cause they are taking after their mom and chugging down the highway to hell so it's just the 2 youngest and her dog. When she is gone the kids will be also and possibly the dog. In 90 days I could get the locks changed, maybe get bars on the windows, pack up her crap and never let her back. Question is will I actually do it and stick to it?? Gus agrees that is the question, finally... after all the above beating around the bush... yeah, he's a smart ass! The answer has yet to be determined... much like my sanity that is teetering on the edge of fleeting and totally gone.